#24: What To Do When It’s All Too Much: Sensory Overload in Motherhood
Tools for sensory-sensitive moms in loud, messy households.
It’s 6:47 a.m. The coffee’s brewing (finally), the dog is barking at absolutely nothing, my youngest is wailing because I won’t let him eat dog hair (how dare I), his sister refuses to put her shoes on, and the fridge keeps beeping at me like I’m a criminal. Meanwhile, my brain? It’s somewhere between wanting to scream and wanting to melt into the floor.
This is sensory overload.
For me, it’s not just a bad day. I have ADHD, sensory sensitivities, and two Level 3 Autistic kids to raise so this is just a normal day for me. So my nervous system lives on the edge 18/7. It’s like walking around in a world that’s constantly cranked up to max volume, with no “mute” button in sight.
If you’re reading this and nodding your head along (or crying into your lukewarm coffee) let me tell you: you’re not fragile. You’re not failing. You’re not crazy. You’re overstimulated. And it’s not just possible to work with your sensory system; it’s literally necessary in order to function.
Here’s why, and how.
The Science Behind Sensory Overload in Moms: Why It Matters
Let’s get nerdy for a second.
Our sensory systems are designed to take in info from the world (lights, sounds, touch, smells) and sort it into “important” or “ignore this.” But if you have ADHD or you’re neurodivergent, that filter is glitchy or sometimes completely missing. Everything comes in at once.
Research shows chronic sensory overload raises cortisol (your stress hormone), leads to emotional dysregulation, and can even mimic trauma responses in the brain. Translation? Your brain isn’t just “annoyed.” It’s on high alert.
But here’s the good news: Sensory systems are trainable. We can’t get rid of triggers entirely, but we can work with our brains and bodies instead of feeling like they’re the enemy.
3 Realistic Sensory-Friendly Tips for Moms:
1. Track your triggers: Start a Sensory Diary for three days. Note times, places, sensations, and your reactions. Patterns = power.
2. Build in micro-resets: Three minutes barefoot outside. Noise-canceling headphones. Dimming the lights. Small pauses lower the temperature on your sensory system.
3. Reframe the shame: You’re not “overreacting.” Your nervous system is protecting you. Respect it instead of judging it.
Tip for Kids:
Create a “Calm Corner”: Weighted blankets, soft lights, favorite textures. Let your kids help design it. Model co-regulation by using it yourself.
2. When Noise Becomes Painful: ADHD, Mom Life, and Sensory Overload
One of the most exhausting parts of sensory overload as a mom with ADHD? Noise.
ADHD brains don’t filter sensory info well. Scientists call it “impaired sensory gating.” Basically, your brain has no bouncer at the club door; it lets everyone in. Every beep, scream, or crinkle of a snack wrapper feels equally loud and urgent.
Studies show this constant overload spikes cortisol and wears down your executive function (a fancy way of saying “the ability to do literally anything”).
This is why moms like us can go from calm to meltdown in seconds, or why we sit in the car in silence before walking into the house.
3 Realistic Tips to Reduce Noise Overload:
1. Limit open-concept chaos: Open floor plans look cute on HGTV. They’re silent killers for sensory brains. Shut a door. Hang a curtain. Put up your kids' artwork. Create visual barriers.
2. Anchor with structure: A small routine (even lighting a candle before breakfast) helps your brain predict what’s next, lowering sensory tension. My kids and I thrive better with routines.
3. Use “Sensory White Space”: Schedule 5-10 minutes daily with zero input. No music, no talking, just quiet. It’s like a spa for your brain.
Tip for Kids:
Use a sound visualizer: A simple app that shows sound levels helps kids understand when a room is “too loud” and they need a break. It also helps them feel in control. (I wish I knew about this one sooner.)
3. Texture Tantrums and Clothing Wars: Sensory Processing and Touch Sensitivity
One of my kids worst sensory triggers? Clothes. Tags. Seams. Or god forbid, sticky fingers.
Tactile defensiveness means your brain reads normal touch as a threat. A shirt might feel like sandpaper. Someone brushing past you can make you want to scream. My daughter never had this problem but BOY does my little man. I can’t turn around in a full circle without him undressing himself completely; pull up and all.
Science backs this up: chronic discomfort from clothes, materials, or even skin products can cause increased irritability and meltdown risk in both kids and adults.
3 Tips for Tackling Tactile Overload:
1. Pick your uniform: Find clothes that never bother you and stock up. Fewer decisions = fewer sensory surprises.
2. Sensory-friendly swaps: Use silicone gloves for dishes (I swear by this), soft blankets, unscented laundry detergent, and non-scratchy sheets.
3. Soothe with safe touch: Soft sweater, warm tea mug, a gentle lotion. Pick textures that calm rather than assault your nerves.
Tip for Kids:
Create a “Yes Bin”: Fill a bin with textures and materials your child loves. Let them choose instead of forcing new sensations. It builds trust and comfort.
4. The Hidden Crash: Understanding Sensory Shutdown and Recovery
Here’s the dark side of sensory overload: the crash.
Your body can’t stay in high-alert mode forever. Eventually, it hits a shutdown or freeze response. This might look like:
zoning out on your phone
sitting in silence staring at the wall
snapping at everyone and then crying alone
dissociating into oblivion
Science calls it the “default mode network” or the brain’s self-preservation system. It’s your nervous system pulling the emergency brake.
I don’t repeat this just for fun; rest isn’t optional. It’s neurological survival.
3 Ways to Recover from Sensory Overload:
1. Schedule recovery time: Don’t wait for the crash. Build rest into your day like a meeting you can’t skip.
2. Lower the bar: It’s okay to have low-sensory, low-output days. Your value is not tied to productivity.
3. Ditch the guilt: Needing a break isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom. Rest is part of sustainable motherhood.
Tip for Kids:
Make a Reset Plan: Have a simple chart or visual schedule for meltdown recovery: deep pressure, quiet toys, dim lights. Let your child help create it so they feel in control.
Recap for Overloaded Moms
Why The Science Behind Sensory Overload Matters: Sensory overload in moms isn’t about weakness - it’s about how our brains process the world differently. Understanding the science helps you stop blaming yourself and start finding ways to work with your sensory system instead of fighting it.
When Noise Becomes Painful: Noise hits differently for neurodivergent moms, and it’s not just “annoying” - it’s exhausting and overwhelming. Giving yourself permission to reduce noise and create quiet pockets of time can help your brain and your body breathe.
Sensory Processing and Touch Sensitivity: Tactile triggers are real, and they’re not about being picky or dramatic; they’re genuine sensory pain. Finding clothing, textures, and products that feel safe helps lower daily stress and makes life feel less like a battlefield.
Understanding Sensory Shutdown and Recovery: Shutdowns happen because your brain needs relief after sensory overload; it’s not laziness or failure. Planning gentle recovery time helps you bounce back with less guilt and shows your kids that rest is a healthy part of life.
Gentle Reminders
You’re not fragile. You’re overstimulated and that’s a real thing.
It’s okay to close a door, turn off the lights, and breathe.
Your comfort matters as much as everyone else’s.
Slow mornings or silent car rides aren’t “wasted time.” They’re therapeutic.
Meltdowns don’t mean you’re failing, they mean you’ve reached your limit.
You can lower the bar without lowering your worth.
It’s brave to honor your sensory needs in a world that tells you to push through.
You’re doing enough. Even when the world feels too loud.
Your Turn, Mama
You’ve made it to the end of this post; which means your sensory system is probably already multitasking like a damn superhero. But here’s where we shift from reading to doing.
Pick ONE tip from this post and try it today. Just one.
Whether it’s dimming the lights, putting on your cozy uniform, or sitting in silence for five freaking minutes; choose something small that helps you feel better in your body.
Then come tell me how it went. Shoot me a DM, drop a comment, or journal it out.
Because you deserve support and space to show up for yourself - messy, imperfect, and real.
A Final Word for You, Mama
Mama, you’re navigating a world that often wasn’t designed for your beautiful, complex brain or for your neurodivergent kids. But you’re not alone, not in the slightest.
Your sensory needs are real. They deserve compassion, accommodations, and respect. And the more we honor our sensory boundaries, the more we model for our kids how to honor theirs.
If you found this post helpful, be sure to check out my other tips on self-care for busy moms, or browse my full collection of motherhood hacks to make life a little easier! Thank you so much for reading, remember to follow me on all my socials and don’t forget to subscribe to my website to be the first to read my weekly blog.
If no one told you today, you are an amazing mom and I see you. You wouldn’t be reading this blog if you weren’t and I am SO proud of you. Keep loving yourself too, mama.
With Love, Caitlin
